“The Dangers of Over-Glamorizing Your Young Daughter: A Parent’s Guide”

A well-fitting and stylish outfit can boost a child’s confidence as they head to school. When a child feels good about their appearance, they tend to communicate and engage in group activities with more assurance. This confidence positively impacts their learning abilities and social skill development.

However, this topic has sparked some controversy. Deciding whether to dress up their children for kindergarten is a significant consideration for parents.

Previously, renowned professor Li Meijin from the People’s Public Security University of China advised parents against overdressing their daughters. She suggested that excessive focus on their children’s outward appearance might sometimes be inappropriate and could negatively influence their future development.

Illustration photo.

Kindergarten is a place where children engage in various play and learning activities. Parents should choose comfortable and easy-to-move outfits for their children, considering the nature of these activities. Clothes that are too tight or bulky may hinder their participation in games.

Additionally, if children believe that dressing up is a prerequisite for acceptance, it could impact their self-perception. Parents need to teach their children that their self-worth stems from multiple factors, not just their clothing.

Moreover, some outfits may be inappropriate for the weather or the learning environment, such as high heels or long dresses. These choices could make children feel uncomfortable or even cause them trouble in their daily activities.

The above are some general suggestions. To help parents understand this issue more profoundly, psychologist Nguyen Ngoc offers valuable insights and advice.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of children, especially girls, being dressed up by their parents when attending kindergarten?

We understand that, in this context, dressing up refers to wearing luxurious, sparkling, and glamorous outfits suitable for special occasions rather than everyday situations.

When children dress up, one advantage is that they feel special and receive admiration from their peers and those around them. This attention can bring happiness and joy. Parents also feel delighted to see their children looking gorgeous. However, this benefit is short-lived, creating only temporary pleasure.

On the other hand, there are several disadvantages. Firstly, when children’s outfits are inappropriate for the context, they may attract negative attention, leading to potential psychological impacts from negative comments, evaluations, or judgments about their appearance or family for not adhering to societal norms.

Secondly, dressing up may make children more visible to potential predators. Thirdly, it can have long-term effects on children’s mentalities, instilling a belief that they must always be superior to others, potentially fostering a sense of arrogance and an excessive focus on external appearances rather than character-building.

Fourthly, it may cause children to be isolated at school, as peers may feel uncomfortable playing with them, leading to detachment from the community.

Can an excessive focus on appearance lead to future pressure on children to maintain their image?

In my opinion, yes. Especially when the child does not desire to dress up but only does so to fulfill their parents’ wishes, believing that they must always look beautiful and outshine their peers, which can lead to pressure to maintain this image.

Research supports this, showing that one cause of stress in individuals is the pressure to maintain a certain image. For example, if a child was previously the top student in their class or won a competition, they may feel stressed about maintaining that level of achievement and upholding their image.

Therefore, parents should consider whether their children will feel pressured to always look their best.

What factors should parents consider when choosing their children’s outfits for school?

Parents should primarily consider whether the outfit is appropriate. Although children’s clothing choices at this age may not reflect their style or personality, they should still adhere to societal standards and limits. 

Secondly, convenience is crucial. For example, choosing outfits that are too tight or revealing may cause discomfort and inconvenience during school activities.

Thirdly, consider the message conveyed by the outfit. For instance, dressing a child in expensive clothing may communicate the family’s economic status or the parents’ social power. This could be a subtle form of communication with society.

Therefore, based on these three factors, parents should select their children’s outfits to bring benefits rather than cause harm or convey misinterpreted messages.

How can we ensure that children still feel comfortable and free to move when dressed neatly and appropriately?

When children are dressed neatly and appropriately, such as having their hair neatly styled or wearing an ironed dress, yet still feel free to move and play, their confidence increases.

On the other hand, the notion of “dressing up” often conjures images of extravagant outfits adorned with beads, sequins, and expensive jewelry, which are more suitable for formal events or special occasions.