“Do we have a lot of money, Mom?”
Sometimes, children ask questions like “are we very poor, Mom?”
Common misunderstanding about the question: We often think that such questions are not important and can be ignored or cautiously answered according to our own perspective.
Suggested way to answer: In fact, this is one of the common questions that kids ask when they are between the ages of 3-8. This is the stage when children start to understand that there is a difference in money and material possessions. They may feel that they have fewer toys than their friends or even think you don’t have the things they have.
The answer should not be just “yes” or “no,” but an opportunity for the child to discuss and reflect. You can ask the child, “Why do you think that?” and listen to the child’s answer, then we can discuss the things that the child cares about.
If your child is interested in the difference between what they have and what others have, you have a great opportunity to help the child understand and appreciate the things we currently have.
If the child feels sad about not having what others have and feels sorry for not getting what they want, you also have a good opportunity to help the child understand the concept of “necessities” and “wants.”
“Mommy, how was I born?”
Common misunderstanding about the question: We often feel hesitant when faced with this question and usually avoid or answer hastily, even possibly with false information like “Mom didn’t give birth to Bin, Mom just picked Bin up.”
Suggested way to answer: Children are always curious about their birth process at different ages. For children under 3 years old, the answer should be concise but provide accurate information, such as “Mom gave birth to Bin from Mom’s belly.” You can illustrate with pictures of you during pregnancy and pictures of the child in the womb.
For children aged 3 and older, the answer can be more detailed through reading books and sharing real stories about the reproductive process.
“Why does Mom go to work instead of staying at home to play with me?”
Common misunderstanding about the question: We often understand the question as the child wanting the mother to stay at home, so we often answer in a “serious” manner to make the child understand that it is not possible to stay at home, for example, “Mom goes to work to earn money for Bin to go to school, to buy toys for Bin.”
This can make the child feel like they are the reason why the mother has to go to work. Although this is an answer with love and sacrifice, sometimes it can make the child feel burdened.
Suggested way to answer: What the child is truly concerned about is why the mother doesn’t stay home and instead has to go to work, and what is it about the mother’s job that makes her feel so happy? The best answer here is to help the child understand the mother’s job.
For example, if you are a grocery store cashier, let the child know that every morning, Mom brings in fruits and vegetables to arrange on the shelf, and Mom checks which ones need to be discarded because they are old. That’s Mom’s daily job. Ask the child, “What would happen if Mom didn’t go to work this morning?” and wait for the answer. Allowing the child to self-realize and reflect will be the most valuable answer for the child.
Do the same with every profession, whether you are a cashier, a public sanitation worker, or any other job. This will help the child have a better understanding of your job and its significance in the child’s life.
