Upon closer observation, it’s evident that many children possess three notable qualities: self-reliance, calmness in the face of setbacks, and emotional intelligence that helps them understand others’ emotions through facial expressions or behavior.
Behind these qualities lies a complex and profound psychological development journey, playing a crucial role in shaping strong, confident, and empathetic adults. It is believed that children who exhibit these traits early on will not only become valuable contributors to society but also a source of pride for their families, bringing happiness and contentment to their parents.
Fostering Self-Reliance in Children – A Solid Stepping Stone for the Future
Self-reliance is an essential factor in a child’s holistic development. From packing their school bags in kindergarten, frying eggs for the family at ages 6-7, or proactively turning off the TV to do homework without being told, children gradually form a sense of “doing things independently.” However, not every child is inherently capable of this; most require guidance and training from their parents.
Parents can encourage their children by allowing them to eat by themselves before the age of three (even if it’s messy), asking if they want to get up on their own after falling down at age five, or teaching them money management skills from the age of seven. When children ask for help, instead of intervening immediately, ask: “What do you think we should do?” This stimulates independent thinking. Additionally, assigning tasks according to their age, such as setting the table (age 3), organizing their school bag (age 5), or frying an egg (age 7), will help children develop a sense of responsibility and life skills. These small acts lay the foundation for their future confidence and resilience.
Self-reliance is a crucial factor in a child’s development
Nurturing Emotional Stability in Children – The Foundation for Calmness and Self-Control
Many children exhibit remarkable emotional control from a young age, remaining calm and composed even when faced with challenges. Psychological studies indicate that these children often have secure attachment styles from early childhood and a well-developed prefrontal cortex, which helps to quickly soothe stress responses originating from the amygdala in the brain. This is akin to having a “calm manager” in their head, prompting them to think carefully before acting.
A child’s emotional stability reflects their family’s upbringing. Parents should focus on three aspects: timely responses to a child’s emotions from ages 0-3 (crying, fussiness), allowing children under six to express their emotions (“I’m angry”), and accompanying children from the age of six (“Let’s find a solution together”). When a child is angry, waiting and reassuring them will promote the development of their prefrontal cortex and reduce the amygdala’s hypersensitivity.
To support this, parents should organize weekly family meetings, using a structure like “event + emotion + need.” For example, a mother might say: “On Wednesday night, you played on your phone until 11 pm. I was worried about your health. I need you to hand in your phone before 10 pm.” The child might respond: “I want to see the ending and feel uncomfortable being monitored. Please trust me to manage my time.” The final agreement would be a solution that satisfies both parties, such as handing in the phone at 9:50 pm and watching the conclusion on Sunday.
Many children exhibit calmness and emotional control when facing challenges
Fostering Empathy – The Key to Connection and Understanding
Some children seem to possess an “emotional intuition,” always sensing and responding to others’ needs. For instance, they might quietly bring slippers to their father when he comes home late from work or close the window and bring warm water when their mother coughs. According to research from Beijing Normal University, the brain regions associated with empathy (such as the anterior insula and inferior frontal gyrus) are twice to three times more active in these children than in their peers.
Empathy is like a mobile phone signal. The mirror neuron system acts as the hardware antenna, but emotional interactions within the family determine the signal’s stability. While empathy is influenced by genetic factors, parents can still enhance their child’s “emotional receiver” through appropriate parenting styles. For example, using phrases like, “How do you think they feel…?” to stimulate empathetic thinking; replacing “Don’t cry” with “What are you worried about?”; discussing the emotions of characters when reading stories or watching movies together.
The continuous nurturing process in a loving and encouraging environment will enable children to develop empathy, grow into confident and resilient adults, and forge deep connections with others.
Nurturing Resilience: Unraveling the Link Between Tough Love and Children’s Success
If you want to raise your children well, don’t neglect the following!
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“The Golden Nine Years”: Shaping Young Lives, a Wake-up Call for Parents
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Mothers, Rejoice: 5 Signs Your Child is Emotionally Intelligent and Destined for Leadership Success
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The Child with the Qualities of a Future Achiever: Unveiling the 3 Early Signs
Behind every good quality in a child lies a process of constant learning and self-improvement.
