Children grow up in curiosity and exploration, learning about the world. When they observe their own family and other families, when they listen to others, children will have certain feelings. So when a child asks a question, it means that the child really wants an answer, and the answer from adults will greatly impact the child’s development in the future. Therefore, if parents do not pay attention to how they answer, it can lead to distorted perceptions in children.
There are certain sensitive questions that children ask that make it difficult for parents to answer. Please note:
Is our family poor?
How would you answer if your child asks “Is our house rich, Mom?”, or “Is our family poor, Mom?” Sometimes, many parents answer right away, saying “Yes, our family is very poor.” Answers like this can hurt the child.
Suggestions for parents on how to answer: In fact, this is one of the most common questions that children aged 3-8 ask. At this age, children understand that there are different demands for money and material things. They ask this question when they see that they cannot buy as many things as their friends, or they may have heard other people say that their family is poor.
The answer is not a simple “yes” or “no,” but rather to let the child discuss and ponder. Therefore, you should ask the child a question like “Why do you think that?” listen to the child’s answer, and talk about what the child wants to hear.
When your child compares themselves to other families, you should explain to them the importance of being grateful for what we have, and why we don’t need certain things yet. If your child feels sad because they don’t have what others have, and they feel sorry for themselves because they don’t get what they want, you have a great opportunity to help the child understand the concept of “necessities” and “wants.” Don’t focus on the concepts of rich and poor, don’t avoid your child’s questions, and don’t pretend to be wealthy or force your child to think that our family is poor. Because those thoughts will make the child sad. Teach the child to understand that it’s not about having money or not having money, but about how we choose to live.
“Mom, why do you work and not stay home to play with me?”
Often we say that Mom has to work to earn money for the child, to support the child, and can’t stay home as the child wishes. That mindset is to avoid being asked by the child to stay home with them. But for the child, they will feel guilty, they will feel like they are a burden.
Suggestions for parents on how to answer: What the child is really interested in is why Mom can’t stay home and needs to work, what is so attractive about work that makes Mom like it so much? The best answer at this time is to help the child understand the work that Mom is doing.
This is when you can share with the child the value of labor and the joy of labor. Share with the child about your own work in a simple way that the child can understand. Then you ask the child “what would happen if Mom didn’t go to work this morning?” and wait for the answer. Let the child realize and reflect, that will be the most valuable answer for the child.
“Mom, how was I born?”
Often parents are puzzled and don’t know how to answer their child, sometimes they answer vaguely like picking up the child in the potato field, or being born from the forehead, or from the abdomen…
Suggestions for parents on how to answer: When a child asks this question, it means that the child is curious about the world around them. If the child is under 3 years old, the answer can be concise, such as “Mom gave birth to you from her belly.” Show the child pictures of a pregnant belly so they can see that the baby was inside the belly and that Mom’s belly was big, and when the baby is born, Mom’s belly becomes small. For children over 3 years old, the answer can be more detailed through reading books and real-life stories.
Each answer you give to your child is a way of guiding and teaching your child. There are more challenging questions, if you can’t answer right away, you should promise your child that you will answer at a later time but don’t make the promise and then forget about it. How we answer our children is how we teach them about life, so don’t be indifferent, don’t think that going to school is the only important thing, there are other questions that are not related to grades but are extremely important in a child’s life.
Small Actions, Big Impact: Parents’ Influence on Children’s Success and Promising Future
It is highly beneficial to educate children before they sleep. Therefore, parents should take advantage of this opportunity to help their children make progress.
Harmful Parental Sayings: Unintentionally Damaging Your Child’s Future, Check Your Impact
If you’re still saying these things to your child, please stop immediately to avoid putting pressure and exhaustion on them.
How Parents’ Common Sayings Ruin Children’s Future but Many People Still Fall for It
Adults often underestimate how much children understand and remember. The truth is, hurtful words can stick with a child and have long-lasting effects.
Quiz to Determine if You’re a Good Parent: Take It Now to Avoid Regrets Later
All of us want to be good parents, but there are ways of raising and nurturing that seem good but are actually not good for children. Check now to fix it in time, avoiding regret later.
Discovering a lie: Instead of blaming parents, do these 4 things
Lying can be frustrating for many parents and may lead to anger and scolding their children. However, according to experts, there are four things that parents should do instead of blaming and scolding.
