The Ideal Parenting Dynamic to Raise Outstanding Children: “Firm Mother, Affectionate Father”

In her opinion, mothers are the epitome of gentleness, love, and emotionally-focused child-rearing.

However, a mother’s excessive love can pose potential dangers to a child’s growth. Children may become reliant on their mother’s help for everything, losing their ability to care for themselves, and even becoming arrogant, dictatorial, and rebellious. Thus, mothers need to learn to be more decisive and strict when necessary.

On the other hand, fathers should embody kindness and power while also providing a sense of stability and safety. When children feel this aspect, they are more receptive to their father’s reasoning.

For a boy, a loving father will understand his emotions, guide him towards maturity, teach him how to express himself, and help him grasp the true meaning of happiness.

For a girl, a loving father will support her decisions, empower her to break free from gender stereotypes, and enable her to lead a more fulfilling life.

Of course, each family’s circumstances are unique, and so the educational methods they choose will vary.

Whether adhering to the principle of “Strict Mother, Loving Father” or any other rule, parents should analyze and make decisions based on their specific family situation.

Parents divide roles based on personality traits, focusing on strengths

Parents can divide educational roles according to their personality traits. For example, if a father is inherently gentle, he should take on the role of the loving parent and need not establish power, be overly frank, or strict. Instead, he should focus on showering his wife and children with love and creating a warm family atmosphere.

The same goes for mothers. Women often have a kinder nature and abundant emotions, allowing them to play a primary role in raising and caring for their children.

Parents divide roles based on their personality traits.

Mothers can spend more time with their children, sharing stories and real-life experiences, creating a sense of safety and bonding. At the same time, mothers can also be flexible in imposing discipline, setting limits, and making demands appropriate to each stage of their child’s development.

Parents are their children’s first teachers, and when their mental state improves, they can save effort and be more dedicated to their children’s education. When children see their parents in a good state, they learn subtly and become more confident. Parents need to understand their children’s personalities, interests, and needs to maximize their roles and influence.

Adhering to the child’s characteristics and adapting to circumstances

Psychology indicates that the period before the age of three is when children need the most attachment to their loved ones. When they receive love and care from their parents, they form a sense of trust in the outside world and accumulate a feeling of safety within.

Therefore, parents need not distinguish between being strict or kind but should shower their children with abundant love and care. Simultaneously, they should plant seeds of “love” and “hope” in their children’s hearts.

Adapting to the child’s characteristics and circumstances.

Starting at age three, when children have developed certain comprehension and expression skills, parents should establish rules to guide them towards better communication with others.

For example: Not being picky about food, not touching electrical appliances, paying attention to traffic lights when crossing the road, and being polite to others…

Behind these strict demands is a deeper love and concern for their children’s well-being.

When children learn to take care of themselves, care for their friends, and follow the rules, they are more likely to live happily and achieve true happiness.

Setting goals and achieving a balance between love and rules

Astrid Lindgren, a renowned children’s writer, said: “Children do need discipline and guidance, but if they are constantly imposed upon, they will struggle to develop self-governance and self-direction.”

When setting rules, if parents only coerce and demand unconditional obedience, children may feel disrespected and develop rebellious tendencies.

A better approach is to include children in the process, encourage open and honest communication within the family, and collaboratively decide on appropriate rewards and punishments. Parents should lead by example and strictly adhere to the established rules.

Teaching children about love and rules goes hand in hand.

The ultimate goal of education is to create a better developmental environment, ensuring children feel loved and supported.

When a family is filled with love, rules, and care, children are more likely to thrive and have a promising future.

Thus, a parent’s role is not just about setting rules and discipline but also about creating a warm family environment, making children feel safe and respected. This foundation is crucial for their comprehensive physical and mental development.