Parents who frequently use words of encouragement will make their children feel loved and valued. This helps build a solid foundation for self-confidence, encouraging them to dare to dream and pursue big goals in life.
On the contrary, unkind words or sarcasm can make children feel insecure and inferior, leaving deep psychological wounds, doubting their abilities, and losing their motivation to strive. Instead of fostering development, these words will only create discouragement, anxiety, and a sense of failure from an early age.
Therefore, in daily communication with their children, parents should avoid saying the following three sentences.
“Why are you so stupid?”
This sentence affects the child’s spirit. When children make mistakes, parents feel disappointed and angry, leading to scolding. Children in the development phase are very sensitive to adults’ comments, and unkind words make them lack confidence and feel shy.
Children are still young, so their thinking ability is not as good as adults, but that does not mean they cannot learn and develop. Each child has their own learning pace, and making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process. Parents need to give children the opportunity and time to get used to new concepts.
Research has shown that children can improve their thinking skills when supported and encouraged in the right way. Therefore, instead of using negative words, parents should work with their children to solve problems more seriously.
Turn mistakes into learning opportunities. Together, broaden your thinking, learn more about the issue, and encourage children to ask questions.
Parents can also use fun learning methods such as games, puzzles, or practical activities to make children more excited about learning. Positive interaction will create a fun learning environment where children feel safe to experiment and explore without fear of criticism.
“If you don’t obey, Mom and Dad won’t love you anymore.”
This sentence makes children gradually lose trust in their parents. When children hear criticism or threats, they will not dare to express their emotions or opinions for fear of being scolded, leading to stress. As a result, children feel lonely and alienated within their own family, which should be a place of safety and love.
Children may feel isolated, lacking support and understanding from their parents. When there is no one to share with, children will carry fear, anxiety, and a lack of self-confidence, always feeling that their parents do not love them. If this situation persists, it will affect the psychological and emotional development of children throughout their lives. When children do not feel loved and accepted, they will have difficulty building social relationships and may develop psychological issues.
If children do not obey, instead of getting angry and making threats, parents should analyze the specific situation. Help children understand the reasons behind their disobedience. This will create an opportunity for parents and children to discuss and build a closer relationship.
In addition, parents should gently and firmly deny unreasonable requests. This teaches children that they cannot always get what they want. Setting clear boundaries also helps children understand that love is not about indulgence but about growth and learning from real-life experiences.
“Look how wonderful that person is!”
In fact, no child likes their parents to compare them to others. This comparison creates tremendous psychological pressure and often makes children feel worse, leading to self-doubt and hesitation to express themselves. When children feel they are not good enough, they are more likely to give up on their efforts and opportunities to grow.
Each child has their own strengths and weaknesses. Instead of comparing, parents need to focus on developing their children’s strengths and helping them recognize their self-worth.
At the same time, parents should also guide children to recognize and improve their weaknesses, creating conditions to optimize benefits and maintain self-confidence.
A brilliant and excellent child is often the result of diligence and hard work. Parents should encourage children to work quietly and positively to create worthy achievements, rather than comparing them to others’ temporary successes. This way, children learn that success does not come immediately but is the result of effort and perseverance.
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