The Art of Refraining from Inappropriate Remarks During the Lunar New Year

The start of a new year is a time to connect with loved ones and offer well-wishes. However, it's important to be mindful of how you reach out; a misstep can cause more harm than good, especially during these sensitive festive periods.

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The Lunar New Year is approaching, and you will undoubtedly be meeting up with many friends and family during these first few days of the year. And if things get a little too merry, remember not to ask the following questions to avoid offending anyone.

1 “Have you gained weight?”

Many people, especially women, are likely to hear this comment a lot during the Year of the Pig. Even if your friends have put on a little weight, refrain from mentioning it, as it may upset them.

Weight issues

2 “When are you getting married?”

Questions like “Do you have a boyfriend?”, “When are you getting married?”, or “When are you having children?” are among the most irritating inquiries for both men and women. Even if they are not single, they may not be ready to settle down yet, so asking about their marital status may make them feel trapped.

Marriage and weddings

3 “Have you found a job yet?”

New graduates are often subjected to questions like “Have you started working yet?” or “Are you still working at the same place?”. While these inquiries may be well-intentioned, they can make the listener feel like they are being judged for not having a job, so it’s best to avoid them.

4 “How much do you earn?”

Discussing salary and bonuses is another sensitive topic. Many people, despite having decent incomes, prefer not to share these details as it may lead to comparisons with others. Instead, ask about their work in a more positive light, such as whether they enjoy their job.

Salary discussions

5 “Any straight-A students this year?”

Showing interest in the academic achievements of the children in the family may seem like a good idea, but it can backfire. Comments like these often lead to comparisons and can make the children feel pressured or disliked by their relatives.

Academic achievements

6 “Where did you learn to dress like that?”

Everyone has their unique sense of style, and while some may not dress conventionally, it’s important to respect their choices. Instead of criticizing their fashion sense, offer a gentle suggestion if you must comment. After all, the new year is a time when everyone wants to look their best and create memorable moments with loved ones.

7 “You’re too old for lucky money now.”

Young adults in their twenties who are already working may not appreciate being told they are too old for lucky money. The Lunar New Year is a time for exchanging well-wishes and lucky money is a way of wishing someone success and good fortune, so don’t forget to give it even to your grown-up nieces and nephews!

Lucky money traditions

Source: Zing News.

The Lunar New Year is a joyous occasion for catching up with loved ones and toasting to a prosperous year ahead. Let’s ensure that our words of celebration don’t unintentionally cause discomfort and leave a sour taste in the mouths of those we care about.

Frequently asked questions

It’s important to be mindful of cultural sensitivity during the Lunar New Year. Refrain from making assumptions or stereotypes about people’s backgrounds or beliefs. Avoid comments that might be considered offensive, such as those related to luck, fortune, or appearance. Instead, focus on offering genuine wishes for a happy and prosperous new year.

Remarks that are best avoided include those that are superstitious, such as asking about someone’s fortune for the new year, or commenting on their luck. Also, steer clear of personal questions or comments about someone’s appearance, weight, or age. These can be considered rude and insensitive.

If you are faced with inappropriate questions, it’s best to respond in a polite and respectful manner. You can gently deflect the question by saying something like, ‘I appreciate your curiosity, but I’d rather not discuss that right now. Let’s focus on the positive spirit of the Lunar New Year instead.’ This way, you set a boundary while still maintaining a friendly atmosphere.

There are many culturally appropriate greetings you can use. ‘Happy Lunar New Year’ or ‘Gong Hei Fat Choy’ (in Cantonese) are common and widely accepted. You can also wish people prosperity and good health, such as saying ‘Xin Nian Kuai Le, Wan Shi Ru Yi’ in Mandarin, which translates to ‘Happy New Year, may all your wishes come true.’ These greetings are respectful and capture the festive spirit.

Yes, there are a few cultural taboos to keep in mind. Avoid giving gifts or money in amounts that end with a four, as it sounds similar to the word ‘death’ in certain dialects. Also, refrain from wearing white or black clothing, as these colors are traditionally associated with mourning. Showing respect to elders and not arguing or raising your voice are also considered good manners during this time.
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