To truly do well for your child, you must grasp the “3 forbidden things” below so that your child can avoid detours and suffer less.
1. Avoid “Excessive Punishment”
When educating children, sometimes scolding and using physical punishment are unavoidable. However, age and methods must be taken into account. If a child under 10 years old makes a mistake, after explaining verbally without correction, physical punishment can be used. A few swats on the child’s bottom can make them feel pain and fear. Or use standing punishments, deduct their pocket money for a month so that they realize their mistake and don’t dare to repeat it.
This strict discipline before the age of 10 is very useful. It can make children fear their parents and have motivation and constraints.
But after 10 years old, when children start to think independently, parents can no longer spank them. At this time, children have already formed their own understanding of things. Therefore, spanking them more will not have any effect and can easily lead to psychological problems.
Therefore, at this time, it is important to limit physical punishment. More education should be given so that children have a sense of boundaries.
During this process, children are often sensitive, so parents need to use scientific and appropriate methods to educate and guide them, using reason more than emotion.
2. Avoid “Preventing Children from Crying” when raising them
The difference in educating sons and daughters is often significant. If a daughter cries, parents will feel broken-hearted. However, if a son cries, parents will scold the boy to “be brave” and even “punish” him.
Parents believe that sons should not cry, that they should be brave and tough. However, in reality, this is not true. Scientific research has proven that at the same age, boys are weaker than girls. Therefore, they need more protection.
Not allowing children to cry also means not allowing them to express their negative emotions. This can lead to the accumulation of emotions inside. When they grow up, they don’t know how to express their negative emotions. Children easily become confused.
Boys are also children, so they should be allowed to release their negative emotions by crying. Otherwise, they will suffer throughout their lives, always having to endure without any way to relieve their worries.
Parents should also allow children to live true to their emotions. If a child is not afraid to express their emotions in front of you, it means they trust you very much. That’s why they can be open about their emotions when they are with you.
Children trust their parents, and parents are a firm support for them to rely on. They will become more successful and outstanding in the future.
3. Avoid “Critiquing Children in Front of Others”
Parents should be conscious and maintain the dignity of their children, not criticizing them in front of others. Although they are children, they still need to uphold their dignity. Criticizing children in front of others will only make them lose their respect and make the problem worse.
Especially for boys, they are also sensitive and need to be respected. Even if they are wrong, it is best not to discipline them in front of others. It is best to wait for emotions to calm down and find a private place to share with them.
In conclusion, parents need to understand the three forbidden things when raising their children in order to help them have a smooth and better educational path.
The most important thing in raising children is their morality. Ancient sages taught that to make a family prosper for 10 generations, morality must be considered a precious heirloom. Therefore, morality is regarded as a solid foundation for building a prosperous family.
A good person is always clean, warm, and virtuous. They think and consider others in everything they do. They also encounter many good opportunities and have many good friends. People with kind hearts will never harm others. That is why they can avoid unfortunate events.
Between father and son, there must be strictness, not casual impoliteness or lack of respect. In the midst of blood ties, love and respect must coexist. Disrespect and impoliteness will result in a lack of love and filial piety, lack of respect and reverence.
If there is no morality, even if a child is talented, it will be difficult for them to succeed. Therefore, the responsibility of teaching children about morality from a young age is extremely important for parents.
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