It’s not uncommon for parents to struggle with getting their children to sleep, leading to various attempts at coaxing them to bed. However, parents sometimes make mistakes in their approach, resulting in their children not only refusing to sleep but also becoming more unruly. Some parents may resort to harsh measures such as scolding or threatening, but these methods are often ineffective in the long run and can be emotionally damaging to the child.
4 Common Mistakes to Avoid When Trying to Get Your Child to Sleep
Using Threats to Coerce Sleep
When children refuse to sleep, parents may lose patience and resort to threats. Statements like, “If you don’t go to sleep, the big bad wolf will get you!” become common tactics employed by many parents. However, using such threats can have detrimental effects on a child’s psychology.
While the child may fall asleep out of fear, it does not indicate a sense of security. In reality, the child may become timid, lack confidence, and develop a fear of being alone, resulting in the need to keep the lights on at night. This anxiety increases stress, leading to frequent nightmares and waking up in a state of tears.
Such “threatening bedtime stories” inadvertently plant a seed of fear in the child’s mind. Over time, the issue can escalate and become more severe.
Even though the child may seem obedient, they are actually enveloped in fear. This sense of insecurity can lead to psychological issues such as anxiety, depression, or emotional disorders.
Using Threats to Coerce Sleep
Vigorous Rocking or Shaking
Some people find that holding and rocking a child helps them fall asleep faster. Singing a gentle tune while rocking can quickly calm a restless child.
However, this method can be dangerous, especially for infants. Their bones are still fragile, their necks are not fully developed, and their brains are in a critical stage of development.
Vigorous shaking can easily lead to “shaken baby syndrome,” a serious condition caused by abrupt and forceful shaking, resulting in brain damage.
Mild cases may cause nausea or dizziness, but stronger shaking can lead to more severe consequences such as intracranial hemorrhage, nerve damage, and even death.
Using Electronic Devices to Coerce Sleep
In today’s world, electronic devices are prevalent, and many parents use mobile phones or tablets to quickly get their children to sleep.
However, the blue light emitted by these screens can inhibit the production of melatonin, a hormone that regulates sleep cycles. This light stimulation tricks the brain into thinking it’s still daytime, thus delaying sleep onset.
Additionally, the content on these devices can easily excite or worry children. The more they watch, the more stimulated their brains become, making it harder to fall asleep. Prolonged exposure can also impact attention development, language skills, and emotional regulation.
Vigorous Rocking or Shaking
Ignoring a Crying Child
Another approach to coaxing sleep is to ignore a child’s cries, believing that they will eventually fall asleep from exhaustion. This is known as the “cry-it-out” method.
While this method may have worked in the past, it undermines the child’s sense of security. When a child’s cries go unanswered, they feel abandoned, scared, and anxious. Even if they eventually fall asleep, the internal wounds remain.
As they grow up, they may become emotionally detached, struggle with controlling their emotions, and find it challenging to form close relationships.
So, What Should Parents Do to Get Their Child to Sleep Peacefully?
In reality, getting a child to sleep is not as difficult as it seems. Experts suggest some gentle, simple, and harmless methods that parents can try.
Establish a Bedtime Routine: Create a consistent bedtime routine and schedule to help your child develop a biological clock. For example, a warm bath before bed, followed by a short story or soft music. Every night after your child’s bath, they will associate the story or music with bedtime and quickly drift off to sleep.
Create a Conducive Sleep Environment: Avoid watching TV or using phones and tablets before bed. Keep talking to a minimum to prevent overstimulation. Dim the lights and maintain a comfortable temperature in the room to promote relaxation.
Establish a Bedtime Routine
Gentle Reassurance: For younger children, gentle touch, patting, or humming can be more soothing than lullabies.
Provide Comfort Objects: Offer soft blankets, pacifiers, stuffed toys, or items with familiar scents like a parent’s shirt. Familiar smells and textures provide a sense of security, helping children relax and fall asleep peacefully.
Remember, the way you teach your child to sleep is how their brain learns to process emotions. So, choose methods that encourage healthy sleep habits and emotional development.
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