Tet is here, when families and relatives gather together, it’s also the time when young people are “asked”. It’s not just about work, study, but also other issues like love, salary. The hardest part is for the Forever Alone people when adults in the family always think that when they grow up, they must have a lover. But in reality, finding the other half is not easy, and it’s not that you will have a boyfriend/girlfriend just because it’s Tet.
The good-looking guys and girls, with good education or stable jobs but still without a significant other, are “defaulted” as being picky. But being talented and having a “significant other” are not necessarily related.
The new year is joyful, but being urged to ask “When will you get married?” many young people just want to run away. It seems like there’s no way to make the people around you stop asking about that. Then, you might try to resist by using humorous sentences.
On Tet holiday, uncontrollably gaining weight because of many delicious dishes is something hard to avoid. But right at the beginning of the year, criticizing other people for being overweight is definitely not pleasant. If you encounter a question like “What did you eat to get so fat?”, you can just laugh it off if you don’t want to answer.
Many people are not aware that income is a private matter, personal and not something that can be revealed to everyone. But sometimes, even if you try to avoid it, they will still ask persistently. If you feel uncomfortable but can’t ignore it, just suggest a certain level so that they can comfortably guess.
After income, you may be questioned about bonuses. If you don’t like being compared to others, you can speak vaguely to avoid giving a specific figure.
Being asked about academic performance is a haunting issue for most students. Questions about achievements or career direction make many people uncomfortable because determining the future is difficult to say. But if it’s with close people, just confide and ask for advice for yourself in the new year.
Meeting friends at the beginning of the year, they usually ask about family, children, and work. But there are those who like to pry into very personal matters. When you feel uncomfortable with such indiscreet questions, you have the right to remind them.
Remember to choose the freshest and most delicious food.
– Prepare in advance: Anticipate potentially sensitive topics and decide how much information you’re comfortable sharing. Practice concise, neutral responses.
– Redirect the conversation: Shift the focus away from the uncomfortable question. For instance, if asked about a delicate topic like salary, you can respond with, ‘Tet is a time for celebration! I’d love to hear about your plans for the holiday instead.’
– Be honest but gentle: If you must disclose sensitive information, do so tactfully. For example, ‘My job search hasn’t been easy, but I’m optimistic about the coming year.’
– Keep your responses brief: Offering lengthy explanations may encourage further probing. A short, polite response like, ‘Thank you for your concern, but I’d rather not discuss this right now,’ should suffice.
– Change the subject gracefully: Steer the conversation towards more comfortable topics, such as shared memories or plans for the new year.
Remember, it’s essential to maintain a respectful tone and body language throughout. This approach will help you navigate potentially tricky conversations while preserving the festive spirit of Tet.
– Marriage and relationship status: ‘Why are you still single?’ Respond with a lighthearted joke, such as, ‘I’m enjoying the search for my perfect partner! But enough about me, tell me about your plans for the new year.’
– Career and salary inquiries: ‘How much do you earn at your new job?’ You can deflect this by saying, ‘I’m grateful for the opportunities my job provides, but I’d rather keep salary details private. Let’s talk about something else—what have you been up to lately?’
– Personal life choices: ‘When are you planning to have children?’ Respond with a gentle reminder of your boundaries: ‘That’s a very personal question. I appreciate your curiosity, but I’d prefer to keep some things private.’
– Academic performance: ‘Why didn’t you get better grades?’ You can answer with a neutral statement like, ‘My academic journey has had its ups and downs, but I’m focused on improving and making the most of my education.’
– Appearance or weight changes: ‘You’ve gained weight!’ Respond with a graceful deflection: ‘Thank you for noticing. I’ve been focusing on my health and well-being, and I feel great. How have you been?’
Remember, it’s all about maintaining your composure and redirecting the conversation away from potentially sensitive topics. Your responses should convey a sense of respect and elegance, ensuring that the festive spirit of Tet remains intact.
– Use ‘I’ statements: Express your feelings and boundaries clearly. For example, ‘I appreciate your interest in my love life, but I’d prefer to keep my dating life private.’
– Offer an alternative topic: Redirect the conversation to a more comfortable subject. ‘I’d rather not discuss my health today. How has your garden been doing? I’d love some gardening tips!’
– Be firm but gentle: If someone persists with intrusive questions, respond firmly but kindly. ‘I understand your concern, but I’m not ready to share details about my job hunt just yet. I’ll be sure to fill you in when the time is right.’
– Set expectations in advance: If possible, communicate your boundaries to close family members beforehand. They can help deflect intrusive inquiries from other relatives.
– Practice self-care: Take breaks during gatherings if needed. Stepping away for a moment can help you recharge and maintain your composure.
Remember, setting boundaries is about honoring your comfort level and personal space. It’s not about being rude but rather establishing healthy limits that allow you to enjoy the festivities with ease and elegance.
– ‘Thank you for your concern, but I’d rather keep that information private for now.’
– ‘I appreciate your interest, but I’m not comfortable discussing that topic just yet.’
– ‘That’s a sensitive subject for me. Let’s talk about something else—I’d love to hear your thoughts on [alternative topic].’
– ‘I’m flattered by your curiosity, but some things are better left unsaid. Shall we catch up on [mutual interest or hobby] instead?’
– ‘I’m in a period of transition, and I’m not ready to share the details just yet. I’ll fill you in when I’m more settled.’
– ‘My plans are still taking shape, and I’ll be sure to share them with you when they’re finalized.’
– ‘I’m taking a different path, and I’m excited about the future. Let’s talk about something more festive!’
– ‘I’m focused on self-improvement, and I’d love to share my journey with you another time. For now, let’s celebrate the new year!’
Remember, these responses allow you to maintain your privacy while keeping the conversation elegant and respectful. It’s all about redirecting the focus away from potentially uncomfortable topics.
predict sensitive topics: Anticipate areas where you might face uncomfortable inquiries, such as marriage, career, or personal choices. Decide how much information you’re willing to share and practice concise responses.
– Practice role-playing: Rehearse conversations with a trusted friend or family member. Role-playing can help you feel more confident and comfortable when faced with tricky questions.
– Have a few neutral topics ready: Prepare a list of safe subjects that you can bring up to redirect the conversation. These could include shared memories, local news, or plans for the new year.
– Stay updated on their lives: Showing interest in their lives can help shift the focus away from you. Ask about their hobbies, grandkids, or recent travels.
– Set boundaries with respect: Communicate your limits clearly but respectfully. For example, ‘I know you mean well, but I’d appreciate it if we could avoid discussing my love life during the holidays.’
– Offer alternative ways to connect: Suggest catching up over a phone call or video chat after the busy holiday season. This way, you can share more personal updates in a less hectic environment.
By preparing in advance, you’ll be able to navigate potentially sensitive conversations with grace and elegance, ensuring that your Tet celebrations remain joyful and harmonious.