The 4 Pivotal Principles of Raising Extraordinary Children: Miss These at Your Peril

Parents who master the crucial rules of friendship find it easy to bond with their children and accompany them on their journey to adulthood.

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There’s only one childhood for every child, and time will pass irrevocably if parents miss the opportunity to be with their children, and it will never come back.

It can be said that all outstanding children stem from a deep bond with their parents.

Study: Most truly outstanding children have a close bond with their parents

We can also understand this as a “high-quality friendship.”

A renowned educational institution in Europe conducted a study on the topic, “What factors promote children’s excellent academic performance.”

The study found that compared to IQ, learning environment, and family economic conditions, the more important factor is the deep companionship of parents.

It can be said that every child has the potential to achieve extraordinary things, and thoughtful education and deep companionship from parents are key factors in unleashing this potential.

As evidence, a couple who successfully raised five children was interviewed. When asked about their learning experience, the couple frankly shared that despite their busy work schedules, they always prioritized accompanying their children in their growth.

Most truly outstanding children have a close bond with their parents.

From elementary to middle school, the father often took the children to visit history, art, science, and technology museums to discuss topics such as history, art, and technological advancements. These experiences broadened the children’s horizons and strengthened the connection between father and children.

Meanwhile, the mother was responsible for guiding the children with household chores, fostering self-confidence, independence, and a sense of responsibility.

Educator Suhomlinsky once said, “Parents are the first educators of their children, and their actions are models for their children to follow, subtly influencing their development.”

In fact, parents not only pass on their lineage but are also the most trusted guides.

From the time a child is born, starts kindergarten, or grows up and enters society, each stage requires family companionship.

During these critical development phases, the words and actions of parents are of utmost importance. If you want your child to become an exceptional individual, you must first set a good example for them to follow.

The quality of companionship is far more important than quantity

Regarding the friendship between parents and children, an education expert once pointed out.

“Many children today are materially rich but ‘orphaned’ in spirit, as they have parents by their side but their emotional support and nurturing needs are not met.”

There is a term in psychology called “emotional neglect,” which refers to the negative emotional experience that occurs when a child’s emotional needs are not met during their development.

For a child, when they do not receive enough attention and love from their parents and instead experience indifference and neglect, they will feel confused, helpless, and even begin to doubt their self-worth.

The quality of companionship far outweighs quantity.

Many parents today come up with various “valid reasons” to justify their absence, such as “I’m too busy with work to spend all day with my child,” “How can I provide for my family if I don’t work?” “I’m already tired; can’t I just relax?”

In reality, work is essential; it is the basic condition for ensuring the normal functioning of a family. However, children are also an integral part of a parent’s life.

Children are very sensitive and can perceive whether their parents’ companionship is sincere or not. Therefore, the quality of time spent together is more important than the quantity.

Master these four key rules for parents to easily befriend their children

Emotional stability lays the foundation for high-quality friendship

Psychology professor Zhang Yiyun pointed out, “Emotional stability in parents is a crucial source of a child’s sense of security.”

Busy work and life can cause the emotions of many parents to fluctuate wildly. If not careful, this “volcanic” emotion can erupt, leading to hurtful words and actions.

If this pattern persists, the child’s sense of security at home will be shattered, and their personality may become timid, fearful, and introverted.

Therefore, parents should learn to regulate their emotions when interacting with their children.

Take a deep breath before getting angry and remind yourself that your child’s development requires patience and tolerance.

Deep communication is the bridge to enhancing mutual understanding

Deep communication with your child is essential to understanding their inner world.

Parents should frequently engage in open and honest conversations with their children.

During these conversations, listen attentively, provide guidance, and encourage your child to express their thoughts and emotions. Offer positive feedback and support.

Through deep communication, parents can understand their child’s needs and concerns and strengthen mutual trust.

Emotional stability lays the foundation for high-quality friendship.

Effective interaction fosters a closer relationship

High-quality companionship does not depend on the amount of time spent together.

Cui Yutao, a child-rearing expert, proposed the concept of “intimate interaction time.”

He emphasized that during specific times, such as after school, before and after dinner, etc., parents should focus on interacting with their children.

Ask them about their day, share joys and sorrows, or engage in an activity or game together.

Most importantly, parents must be fully present, making their children feel loved and understood.

Let go appropriately and give children the space to grow

Renowned psychologist Wu Zhihong emphasized, “Parents who know when to let go will raise self-reliant and confident children.”

As children grow up and become more independent, they often crave more autonomy and decision-making power.

Let go appropriately and give children the space to grow.

However, many parents tend to interfere too much in their children’s lives, worrying or trying to control them.

This can lead to frustration and conflict within the family.

Therefore, parents should learn to let go appropriately and give their children enough trust and respect.

When they face challenges, encourage them to think and solve problems independently. Share their joy and pride in their progress. With this approach, children can develop in a free environment and become independent and confident individuals.

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