A mother’s role in shaping her child’s character and virtues is paramount, influencing how they interact with the world around them. Creating a warm and loving environment fosters self-confidence in children, allowing them to open up and explore their surroundings. Conversely, a child who experiences indifference or neglect from their mother may develop psychological issues such as anxiety, depression, or a lack of self-confidence.
According to experts, a mother should focus on nurturing herself and teaching her child in three key aspects: self-care, empathy, and resilience. These form the foundation for a child to develop a healthy personality, good habits, and a positive life outlook.
Selflessness and Forgiveness Make Children More “Attractive”
The social exchange theory suggests that people are more likely to help others if they are willing to give. Mothers who want their children to succeed should provide opportunities for them to contribute and develop new skills, helping them understand their abilities and value. This can be done by regularly involving children in charitable activities and sharing resources, such as toys and knowledge.
Such experiences teach children the value of helping others and show them how their actions can positively impact their community. For example, when planning classroom activities, consider holding a family meeting to discuss: “How can we make things easier for others?”
Give Your Child Ownership of a Weekend: Let them take charge of family activities, from choosing the outing location to making a list of things to prepare. This will help them experience the feeling of taking care of others and understanding the meaning of giving and responsibility.
Encourage a Daily Gratitude Practice: Inspire your child to write down three things they are grateful for each day, such as “Thank you to my classmate for lending me an eraser.”
Build a “Skill Bank” from an Early Age: Encourage your child to develop a network of friends who can help each other. For example, if your child excels in English and their friend in math, encourage them to tutor each other. Don’t underestimate the power of this “exchange,” as it fosters a habit of cooperation and mutual support, which will benefit them in their daily lives and future careers.
Involve Your Child in Community Projects: Engage them in initiatives like community gardening, food drives, or charitable events. This will not only help them develop a sense of contribution and compassion but also allow them to interact with a diverse range of people and learn valuable social skills.
Empathy Allows Children to Understand Their Own and Others’ Needs
Empathy activates the brain’s mirror neuron system, helping individuals quickly understand their own and others’ emotions. Mothers who regularly analyze the motivations behind kind acts can help their children develop empathy more easily. This is crucial, as empathy enables children to build positive relationships and cultivate essential social skills for later life.
Incorporate empathy into your daily life and conversations. For instance, if your child notices a sad friend, ask them: “How do you think your friend is feeling? Why do you think they are sad?” Such inquiries will encourage your child to think deeply about and analyze the emotions of others.
Teach your child about empathy.
Additionally, share stories, movies, or books with empathetic characters, and discuss the emotions and actions of these characters to help your child recognize and understand the feelings of those around them.
By practicing empathy from a young age, your child will naturally learn to recognize the “need signals” on others’ faces. Create real-life scenarios for your child to practice, such as encouraging them to help elderly individuals cross the street or share their toys with friends.
It’s also important to teach children how to express their own emotions effectively. Guide them on how to articulate their feelings and actively listen to others. For instance, when your child shares something with you, give them your undivided attention and respond with statements that show your understanding, such as, “I understand that it’s hard for you to share your toys.”
Explain Challenges in a Positive Light to Foster Optimism and Resilience
A mother’s reaction to challenges, difficulties, and failures significantly influences how her children perceive the world and themselves. Conveying positive messages helps children develop a strong mindset and resilience.
Avoid saying things like:
“We don’t have money, so don’t compare yourself to others.” (This creates a sense of inferiority.)
“Your father is incompetent, so you have to do better than him.” (This creates family conflict.)
“What else can you do besides studying?” (This limits their potential.)
Instead, change the way you communicate, and lead by example.
For example, say, “I don’t have enough money to buy Lego right now, but we can build a castle with cardboard boxes. I think this is a fun idea!” This encourages creativity and shows your child that simplicity can also bring joy.
Instead of accepting defeat, guide your child to find solutions: “I think this method isn’t very effective. Let’s try a different approach.”
Foster optimism.
Resilience determines whether children develop positively and achieve true success. When mothers attribute failures to temporary and external factors (“You didn’t do well this time because you used the wrong method”) instead of blaming their children, they nurture resilience.
Mentally resilient children quickly adjust their thinking, analyze their mistakes, and improve the next time. Help your child develop the habit of viewing failures as learning opportunities, and encourage them to set new goals and develop strategies to achieve them.
