The Two Suffocating Love Styles that Push Children to Leave Home

However, this process is not easy. According to a recent survey in China, more than 60% of parents make two mistakes when raising their children.

There are two ways parents’ love can unintentionally affect their children’s growth

Treating their children as “kids” even when they are adults

Many parents tend to think of their children as still young, even when they have grown up or started their own families. This mindset often stems from parental love and the habit of taking care of their children since they were young.

However, as children get older, it is crucial to give them certain responsibilities and allow them to make their own decisions. Parents should start reducing the level of care and attention they used to provide to create space for their children’s independent growth.

For example, when children start school, parents often take on many tasks such as laundry, bed-making, cooking, and preparing everything for them. But as children grow up, parents need to let them handle some necessary tasks on their own.

Additionally, if parents continue to treat their children as kids, a day may come when they are no longer able to perform these tasks or do them well, and the children may feel dissatisfied and complain about the lack of care.

Treating their children as “kids”.

Over-interfering with their daily habits and routines

Many parents tend to interfere too much with their children’s daily habits such as eating and sleeping. They believe that their children lack life experience and that any action different from their own is a mistake. They worry that if they don’t control everything, their children will not develop properly or even encounter problems in life.

However, parents need to recognize that today’s world is vastly different from a few decades ago. The pressures children face, from academics to social relationships, have evolved. Today’s environment is not only more diverse but also more complex due to the rapid advancement of technology and information. Therefore, over-interfering with their children’s daily habits may unintentionally hinder their development of independence and problem-solving skills.

Children need the space to learn from their mistakes. Allowing them to experiment and explore will help build their confidence and decision-making skills. If parents always interfere and adjust everything, their children will not have the opportunity to develop the adaptability and independence necessary for their future lives.

Moreover, tight parental control can lead to conflicts in family relationships. Children may feel disrespected and develop a rebellious attitude.

So, what should parents do to create a healthy environment for their children’s personality development?

Be yourself and be mindful of boundaries

Once your children have grown up and established their careers, they deserve respect from their parents regarding their viewpoints and lifestyle choices.

This shows trust and gives them the necessary space to develop independent thinking. When encouraged to freely express themselves, children will have the opportunity to explore, learn, and grow more comprehensively.

Be yourself and respect boundaries.

In reality, many parents tend to have expectations and believe that their children need to meet certain standards to maximize their potential and live the life they desire. However, this can unintentionally put pressure on them.

Respecting your children’s opinions and choices helps build trust and creates a positive environment for personal growth. When children feel heard and understood, they will be braver in pursuing their passions and dreams.

Show mutual respect

Sometimes, there may be disagreements between parents and their children. In such situations, if parents cannot persuade their children through rational discussion, it is important to listen and respect their emotions and thoughts.

When parents realize that their children’s viewpoints differ from theirs, they should also take some time to reflect. They need to consider whether their perspective truly aligns with their children’s perspective. Instead of assuming they are always right, parents should be open to embracing fresh perspectives from the younger generation.

This helps build a positive communication atmosphere in the family, encouraging children to feel respected and heard.

Show mutual respect.

Offer affirmations

Affirmations and words of praise boost children’s confidence and promote positive psychological and personality development.

When children receive praise from their parents, they feel valued and recognized. This confidence will accompany them throughout their adulthood, giving them the courage to express themselves and face challenges.

When children know that their efforts are acknowledged, they will be motivated to strive for improvement in the future.