5 things you shouldn’t prohibit your child from doing, because the more you prohibit, the more they want to do it, change the approach for better success

Raising children involves many things we don't want them to do, but the strange rule is that the more we forbid them, the more they do, especially these 5 things.

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Prohibit children from tearing and dirtying clothes

Parents hesitate when they see their children’s clothes dirty, stained with paint, or ink. However, if you forbid your child from getting dirty and they are punished by their parents… then the child becomes even more afraid and does not dare to explore. This causes children to miss opportunities to discover the world. It is normal for young children to be curious because that is a way for them to explore the world and have more energy.

Sometimes children hear so much about it that they get bored when their parents mention it. They might even intentionally draw on their clothes. That’s why parents should categorize clothes for their children and when the child gets dirty, gently remind them.

Prohibit children from spending money on things that adults consider useless

Parents should not forbid their children from buying things that they consider useless. Instead of prohibition, teach your child about saving money and how to distinguish between what needs to be bought and what doesn’t. If your child has saved money, you should not forbid them because they may resort to dishonest actions to buy it. If you see that item as meaningless, explain it to your child. But if the child really wants to buy it, you might even let them experience the feeling of regret after buying it so they will understand that it is meaningless. That is how they will learn to control their expenses and differentiate between temporary preferences and truly important needs and desires.

Prohibit children from resting when they don’t want to study

When children are tired, or when they are under pressure in their studies, they can become bored and want to take a break from studying. Don’t forbid them, but talk to them instead. Don’t force them to study more, they can take a day off. Good academic achievement is not important, what is important is the mental and psychological well-being of students while they have too many assignments at school. Sometimes, a day off can make them feel more comfortable with studying, while continuing to force them can lead to prolonged boredom, which is harmful.

Comfort your child and encourage them to share their feelings and emotions with you. This way, you can reduce the pressure on your child.

Prohibit children from arguing with adults

Many parents believe that adults have experienced enough and they know what is good and what shouldn’t be done, so children must follow without questioning. But if parents think that way, they are depriving children of the right to express their opinions. Teach your child to argue in a civilized manner and not chaotically, but don’t forbid them from speaking up and expressing their thoughts. When children are forbidden to express their opposing opinions, they will be suppressed, and furthermore, this method will eliminate their thinking. And this imposition will lead to the increasing distance between parents and children.

When encountering an issue of disagreement, parents should let their children speak up to recognize their opinions. From there, both sides can analyze and find a better solution instead of arguing or forcing the child.

Prohibit children from doing things that adults consider too naive

When children are considered young and ignorant, they grow up knowing that they will know when they are older, and they are just children… This will make children want to grow up quickly and escape from the control of their parents. Many children will force themselves to grow up, even pretend, which makes it difficult for them to develop. Therefore, if your child still has the characteristics of a child along with their childhood interests, there is no reason for you to force them to give up these things. Let your child develop at their own pace.

The most important thing in parenting is to use your own experiences to analyze for your child, from which they can make the best choices, not impose your own views on them and try to make them do as you want. Therefore, remember that children are independent individuals and in order for them to develop well, parents need to accompany them instead of using the authority of adults to impose on them.

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Frequently asked questions

Prohibiting your child from doing certain things can often have the opposite effect of what you intend. By forbidding an action or behavior, you may inadvertently make it more desirable to your child. This is because prohibitions can create a sense of curiosity, defiance, or a desire for independence. Instead of focusing on restrictions, it’s often more effective to educate your child about potential risks and consequences, set clear boundaries, and encourage open communication.

Consider adopting a more collaborative and communicative approach. Rather than simply imposing rules, involve your child in discussions about boundaries and expectations. Explain the reasons behind certain guidelines and listen to their thoughts and concerns. By treating your child with respect and understanding, you can foster a sense of responsibility and self-regulation. Additionally, focus on providing positive alternatives and redirecting their energy towards constructive activities.

Allow your child to make mistakes and experience natural consequences. This helps them learn valuable lessons and develop problem-solving skills. Encourage age-appropriate exploration and risk-taking, as it fosters independence and a sense of adventure. Don’t restrict their creativity and self-expression, whether it’s through art, music, or unique fashion choices. Lastly, don’t prohibit them from asking questions and expressing their emotions, as this helps build emotional intelligence and a strong parent-child relationship.