Raising children, parents’ speech attitudes have a huge impact on the future of their children. If you frequently have such treatment habits with your child, please stop immediately:
Parents often say “You can only do that much”
This mocking attitude of parents makes children gradually lose confidence. Moreover, children will feel inferior and never have self-confidence, always pinning in their heads that they will not succeed. That gradually degrades the child’s ability. Parents should actively praise and specifically compliment the things that children can do. Instead of saying “Oh, a small prize, What’s that worth…” say “You are amazing, there are more wonderful things waiting for you, parents are proud of you.”
Parents who often mock and fail to acknowledge their children like that will raise a child who grows up with a lot of self-doubt. This not only affects their future psychological development, making them easy to be wounded, but also the parents themselves with low EQ will find it difficult to achieve greatness.
Physical violence or verbal violence towards children
Violence against children is not just a mistake, it is a sin. Many parents use their authority to educate their children. They use their authority to shout, forcing the child to do something according to their own desires. However, for children, gentleness and patience are much more effective. Of course, the boundary between pampering and discipline is very fragile, and parents should learn how to discipline children intelligently. You should create seriousness and rules for your child from an early age, strict but not means scolding and insulting. Especially, verbal violence as brutal as physical violence tends to be overlooked.
Parents like that will make their children afraid, they become introverted, do not want to share with anyone, may have behavioral and language disorders, and even nervous system problems. All types of violence are cruel. But sometimes parents think that only physical abuse is violence, while verbal abuse is just a passing thing. However, words also stick into the hearts of children and can hurt them in the long run.
Not allowing children to express their emotions
Children have a lot of different emotions, so they are easy to cry, laugh, speak, and even show anger and resentment. Many parents do not encourage but use force to suppress the child, making the child excessively suppress emotions. Therefore, you should acknowledge those emotions and let your child know what his/her thoughts are. Sometimes young children do not know how to express their emotions, when a child is not happy, they will express it by being angry at their parents. If the child is stubborn and does not listen to the parents, the parents can ask: “Now, are you very angry? Are you dissatisfied?”. This is how parents should help children speak their own thoughts, help them realize that their parents care and understand them.
Restricting children from expressing themselves
Many parents are afraid that their children will become arrogant or relax on their victories, so they excessively restrict their children from expressing themselves. That makes the child no longer innocent and not dare to reveal themselves, not dare to express themselves. After being born, children will find it difficult to leave a mark on others. That habit of suppressing oneself also makes the child frustrated, scared, gradually closing themselves.
Regularly venting anger on children
Many people encounter troubles in their lives, such as with colleagues, in work, with spouses, with parents do not know how to deal with emotions and pour them onto their children in anger. That makes the child become a bulletproof vest, a trash can. It is a very terrible feeling that makes children tired, and afterwards they also become aggressive and bad tempered. After that, the child will feel afraid of his/her own parents, feel suffocated in his/her own family. Many children will resent and be frustrated and feel that their parents are really unfair.
Parents need to learn how to control their emotions, release their frustrations and vent out when coming back to their children, if not, you will ruin all relationships. Not only adults suffer pressure, even young children face pressure at each stage of their age. So try to love each other.
Parents force their children to study, but do not know how to let them rest and relax
Many parents expect too much from their children and force them to meet their expectations, pursuing achievements and wanting their children to achieve their set targets. Therefore, many parents force their children to study without caring about their relaxation, not caring about what their children want, what they like, what abilities they have, and what weaknesses they have. That creates huge pressure, which can make children nervous. Therefore, you need to encourage your child to combine studying with playing to maintain a balance. Parent’s participation in playing with the child is even better, it strengthens the bond, and helps understand the child better.
In the journey of raising children, everything is not easy, but remember that if you do hard work, the child will have greater achievements, as each tree bears fruit.
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