During the process of being parents, there will be times when you are criticized by others like your parents-in-law, neighbors as “lazy”, “not good”, “not attentive”… But in reality, there are things that if you are lazy, it will create opportunities for your child to develop better, and if you are “attentive”, your child will become an industrialized chicken. That is the difference between love and loving properly, between educating children with emotions and educating children with reason. So remember that being lazy in these 4 things will be good for your child:
“Being lazy” encourages and scolds the child
Create independence for your child. You are a companion, sharing, guiding your child, rather than living in place of your child. So if someone has to urge and remind your child to do things, it’s not good. Therefore, don’t be afraid if your child has not completed the task or is late for school. Cut out phrases like: “Hurry up, what are you doing that makes you late?”; “Hurry up, just 5 minutes left”; “Why do we always have to remind you every day? If we don’t remind you, what will you do?”;… Your repeated words may irritate your child, so sometimes they will react negatively. And if your child doesn’t know, let them bear the consequences once or twice to be afraid. You don’t need to scold a lot, just give appropriate praise when you see the child doing well, in a timely manner, stimulate the child’s desire to strive, everything will become better. The scolding and urging will only increase annoyance and disharmony, it only solves the situation at that time, not at the root. To solve it at the root, you need to teach your child, show them what they should do, if they don’t do it, it will affect them, making them feel responsible without you reminding them.
“Being lazy” protects the child everywhere, every time
Many parents always try to be perfect and protect their child every step of the way. From the moment the child is born, parents put all their effort into taking care of the child. When the child is born, afraid of the child’s hands being hurt, parents wear gloves for the child. When the child starts walking, afraid of the child bumping, parents always stay close, protecting the child in their arms. So sometimes even when the child grows up, parents still keep that habit, when the child falls, they quickly pick them up, even knocking over a glass of water, blaming the glass… Don’t do that, parents. Let the child walk on their own when necessary. Let the child explore the world and gradually take responsibility according to each age. When the child learns to walk, let the child fall and get up on their own first, don’t rush to pick them up. When you have told the child not to go near the water, but they still want to, don’t try to follow them and take the child out, let the child step in and wet their feet to know the consequences.
Protecting the child everywhere and every time will take away the opportunities for the child to explore the surrounding life, the opportunities to experience. The result of this is that the child will become increasingly timid and dependent on parents. Once they are away from the care of their parents, they will become confused and not know what to do.
“Being lazy” in doing household chores instead of the child
Children do small things, not just for the sake of being small, they have the right not to do anything. Don’t think that as long as your child is good at studying and healthy. Don’t do that! From a young age, you need to train your child to participate in housework to develop their skills and understand their role. Let the child fold clothes, clean the house, organize toys, tidy up the room… Taking action on behalf of the child or seeing the child struggling for a long time will make the child increasingly dependent and not know how to take care of themselves. Over time, when they grow up and have to live on their own, for example, when they go to university far from home, they will not be able to cope with personal life. This lazy way of parenting is the key to your child growing up to be independent, confident, and successful without fear of challenges. So parents can rest assured, and children will have the opportunity to grow up and succeed on their own.
“Being lazy” in doing homework for the child
Your child’s homework is your child’s responsibility, parents are just there to support and guide, not to do it for them. To improve your child’s academic performance, parents often help their child with homework. Many parents supervise their child’s learning just like a teacher, causing a sense of embarrassment and discomfort for the child. Give instructions and let the child study on their own, because it’s the child’s work, not for parents. If the child thinks that they are studying for their parents, they will develop a discouraged attitude, rely on others, and lack motivation to learn.
Never do homework for your child. Give instructions, if the child makes a mistake, let them do it again, take responsibility with the teacher. Teach your child how to find solutions, but never give them the answers. The child will realize their own efforts, accept them, not because parents will act differently.
When parents are lazy in these tasks, their children will do it themselves and have to do it, learn that it is their responsibility. When children realize these tasks and know how to do them, it will improve their skills, self-sufficiency, and high self-esteem. From there, when they are born, they are strong, confident, resilient, and not afraid. Therefore, parents can be reassured, and children have the opportunity to grow up, be independent, and succeed.
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