What is the right way to educate a child? Parents play a crucial role in laying the foundation for their child’s success, helping them develop good character and a sense of what it means to be a good person.
When parents adopt a positive mindset towards education, their children benefit from a strong family foundation that will positively impact them throughout their lives.
The success of parenting is closely linked to verbal expression, especially the tone of voice used when speaking to children. This can profoundly affect their EQ, IQ, temperament, and self-cultivation.
A Confident Tone
Children yearn for the trust and confidence of adults. Therefore, parents should convey absolute trust when communicating with their children.
In reality, a child’s potential far exceeds our imagination. If parents can fully trust in their child’s abilities, the child will not limit themselves and will confidently tackle any challenges that come their way.
For instance, if your child wants to learn how to play badminton, say with a confident tone: “If you practice diligently and take it seriously, you will definitely learn how to play.” This will boost their confidence and help them understand that persistence leads to success.
On the other hand, using a sarcastic tone like “Look at how you’re holding the racket. Do you even know how to play?” will only make them doubt their abilities.
When parents show genuine trust and support, children sense it and are motivated to maximize their potential. This not only boosts their confidence but also fosters a resilient mindset, enabling them to overcome any challenges in their path. Parental trust is a priceless source of encouragement and the key to unlocking a child’s extraordinary abilities.
A Respectful Tone
From the age of two or three, children start to develop self-awareness, which strengthens as they grow older. They begin to form their own opinions and become aware of their strengths and capabilities.
When children express their thoughts and make requests, parents should listen and avoid being dismissive. In such situations, it is crucial to avoid opposition and instead foster an environment where the child feels heard.
For example, if your child wants to play instead of studying English, saying something like “You’re getting older, and you’re becoming disobedient. If you don’t study hard, what will you amount to when you grow up?” will only make them resent studying.
Instead, try using a respectful tone: “You can play for another five minutes, but after that, we need to focus on English, okay?” This approach is more likely to be well-received because the child feels respected and considered.
When parents listen and understand their child’s thoughts and perspectives, it fosters a sense of respect and encourages cooperation. This helps build a strong bond between parent and child, contributing to the development of independence, confidence, and decision-making skills.
A Discussing Tone
If you want your child to do something, try using a discussing tone.
For instance, if you want your child to pick up toys scattered on the floor, you could say: “Sweetie, leaving toys everywhere is not a good habit. Can we put the toys away together? That way, we’ll make the room neat and tidy.”
This approach makes children feel respected and valued as equal members of the family. They are more likely to cooperate when treated with respect rather than being scolded.
Avoid using commanding tones like: “Look at this mess! Toys are everywhere! Clean it up now!” Typically, when children hear scolding, they won’t be happy even if they comply with your request.
Instead, foster open communication, listen to your child’s opinions, and propose solutions together. This helps children feel respected and creates an environment where family members understand and support each other.
When children are treated with respect, they learn to respect themselves and others. This is a crucial foundation for their physical, intellectual, and social skill development.
A Praising Tone
Every child has unique strengths and a desire to express themselves. Recognizing and valuing these strengths will encourage them to showcase their talents.
For example, when your child draws a picture, it may not be perfect, but their enthusiasm and seriousness are their most significant strengths. If you offer only a casual compliment like: “Your drawing looks average, but keep practicing.” This lukewarm praise will dampen their enthusiasm and confidence.
Instead, acknowledge their effort and show your appreciation: “Today’s drawing is better than the last one. The lines and colors are more harmonious. If you keep practicing, I know you’ll get even better.” When children’s efforts are recognized, and they experience positive emotions, they will be more inclined to continue drawing.
Sincere and specific praise will motivate children to develop their skills further. They feel valued and respected, which boosts their confidence to express their interests and talents. This approach helps children discover and develop their strengths, leading to confident, creative, and happy individuals.
An Encouraging Tone
When children make mistakes, experts advise against criticism and blame. Instead, help them learn from their mistakes, gain experience, and encourage them to try again.
For example, if your child is helping you serve food and accidentally drops and breaks a bowl, avoid saying something like:
“You can’t even hold a bowl properly. You’re so clumsy.”
Such statements will only weaken their confidence and courage to try new things.
Instead, use an encouraging tone:
“It’s okay if you accidentally break a bowl. I’ll check if the food is too hot before serving it next time.”
This way, you’re not only teaching practical methods but also boosting their confidence to try again.
Parents should strive to create a nurturing environment for their children, finding fun and interactive ways to engage with the world, their future, and their passions. All these efforts will enable children to lead high-quality lives.