Emotional intelligence (EQ) is increasingly being recognized as a crucial factor, on par with IQ, in assessing an individual’s potential for success. Children with high EQ often attract admiration from those around them. Here are 6 signs to identify children with high EQ:
Good at recognizing non-verbal cues
Children with high EQ are often referred to as “emotional detectives,” with a keen ability to grasp others’ emotions through observing facial expressions and body language.
Illustrative example:
A child with high EQ may analyze, “Mom, today I noticed that friend A spoke less than usual. When I asked if they wanted to play, they declined. I think they might be feeling sad for some reason.”
To develop this skill in children, parents should spend time conversing with their children every day, discussing the emotions they perceive when interacting with others. These conversations will help reinforce children’s ability to recognize emotions, boost their confidence in understanding others. Parents can ask, “Today, how do you think your friend A is feeling?”
Show empathy and offer support
Children can not only recognize others’ emotions but also demonstrate deep concern and suggest helpful solutions.
For example:
In a game, a child notices their friend’s sadness after losing. The child approaches and says, “I can see that you tried your best. Would you like to play a different game?”
– Method to develop this skill: The most effective way to teach children about empathy is for parents to lead by example. For instance, when they notice their neighbor looking unwell, they can say, “I am very concerned about our neighbor. I will ask if she needs any help.”
Comfortable expressing their own emotions
Children with high EQ have a keen sense of self-awareness and are proficient in communicating their emotions.
Consider the following examples:
A child may say, “I feel disappointed because I couldn’t solve this problem,” or “I am very happy because I could help my friend.” These are expressions of children feeling free and comfortable to share their emotions.
To develop this skill, parents should regularly express their own emotions, such as saying, “I feel bored when I can’t find the keys,” or “I feel tired thinking about the tasks to be completed today.” This helps children understand that discussing emotions is normal and makes them more natural in doing the same.
Remain calm
Children with high emotional intelligence can handle disappointments calmly, demonstrating emotional maturity.
Take the following example:
When an outdoor field trip unexpectedly gets canceled due to rain, instead of allowing negative emotions to dominate, children with high EQ stay calm and accept the change: “Oh, it’s raining, we can still organize an indoor outing.”
To build this skill in children, parents need to lead by example, handling situations flexibly and calmly. Parents can suggest alternative problem-solving approaches by asking, “If we can’t do it this way, what else can we do?”
Effective listeners
Children with a keen sense of emotional awareness can pick up on cues that others may not notice. When parents share about their day, children listen attentively and express understanding of emotions.
To develop this skill in children, when a child wants to tell a story, parents should give their full attention to the child. Communication can be done through eye contact, pausing all other activities, and listening intently. Parents can reflect and repeat what the child says to make them feel truly heard and understood.
Self-regulate emotions
Imagine a situation: your child is participating in a game but unfortunately loses. Instead of succumbing to disappointment, a child with the ability to self-regulate emotions will perform actions such as taking deep breaths to maintain calmness and return to positive thinking. This demonstrates the child’s ability to maintain composure even when faced with disappointment.
To help children develop this skill, parents can teach children to control minor angry reactions like yelling or overreacting. Parents can also introduce the technique of “pause and breathe,” teaching children to take deep breaths or count to 10 during difficult moments.