Tet holiday is a time of joy and celebration that seems to spread everywhere, but no one can be happier than children, with their innocent souls eagerly counting down the days to Tet even before the month. However, in the warm space where family gathers, conversations often revolve around children, unaware that jokes or casual comments can turn joy into a haunting for them.
Especially among adults, there are quite a few who like to compare and analyze their own children as well as others, without realizing that their thoughtless words can deeply affect the psychology of children, especially those aged 7 to 13. This is the stage when children begin to form a certain perception and understanding of the world around them, but their views on life and themselves are still easily shaken. Therefore, the “definitions” that adults set, whether for good intentions or just jokes, can become standards that children mistakenly believe to be right and immutable.
Therefore, this Tet holiday, stay away from saying 3 sentences that you think are jokes, but can create wounds that are not easily healed in the souls of children. Creating a healthy Tet space is not only about joy, but also about caring for and protecting the fragile souls of children.
Don’t tell children that they are less beautiful than others
During Tet, putting on new clothes is a source of great happiness for children. When they are confident in their new outfits, children usually pay great attention to people’s judgments. Therefore, avoid making negative comments about children’s outfits, such as being inappropriate or not beautiful enough, because those words can extinguish their enthusiasm.
Worse, there are adults who not only criticize, but also ask children to change their clothes to let others try on, and then comment that the other person looks better. While adults may see it as a trivial matter, from the children’s psychological perspective, these actions and words can cause a feeling of insecurity and loss of interest in those new outfits.
Don’t tell children that their siblings are loved more
In any situation, speaking thoughtlessly without considering the impact on family harmony is something that should not be done. Especially during Tet, when people gather, some people often unconsciously use words as jokes with young children to get attention, not realizing the consequences of their actions.
Jokes that seem light-hearted but can sow negative thoughts in children’s minds, such as feeling unloved by their parents. This not only causes deep wounds for children, but can also trap them in a long-lasting anxiety about their parents’ feelings towards them.
Don’t tell children that someone is smarter or has higher scores
Avoid discussing grades and academic achievements during Tet, don’t assume that it is something that all children desire.
During Tet gatherings, many parents frequently mention their children’s grades and achievements. They compare who performs better, who doesn’t achieve the expected results, creating an unnecessary atmosphere of competition. Sometimes, parents see this as a way to encourage their children, or just a hidden habit of comparison.
However, it’s not only adults who want to save face, children also feel the pressure. The high-achievers may feel proud, but the low-achievers may feel insecure, not daring to hold their heads up in front of friends and relatives, especially siblings.
If you truly love children, don’t use negative ways of “encouragement” or “comparison”, especially during Tet. When communicating with children, choose words of praise and encouragement. Don’t forget that words have great power and children’s psychology is often sensitive.