Stop Spanking When Angry
During the process of raising children, some parents lose control and resort to physically punishing them. When angry, they may feel remorseful about their actions, but the emotional wounds can leave a lasting impact on the child. As a result, children may become fearful and distant from their parents.
Young children are often energetic and sometimes do not obey the instructions of adults. This is part of their normal development. Children are not dolls to be controlled, but individuals with their own thoughts who do not always follow commands.
Therefore, when parents feel anger towards their children to the point where their emotions are out of control, it is wise to temporarily leave the situation and engage in an activity to release stress, such as calling a friend, using a phone, or going for a walk. Once calmness is regained, having a conversation and addressing the issue with the child will be much more effective than yelling or hitting.
Understand Your Child’s Situation
A five-year-old girl frequently wakes up at night and cries loudly. Despite the comforting efforts of her mother, the girl continues to cry. Frustrated, the mother yells at and spanks the child. This makes the girl feel terrified to the point where she starts lying upside down when sleeping.
Nightly crying in children is not uncommon, especially in children older than three, and it can disrupt the whole family’s sleep. Instead of reacting in anger, parents should try to understand the reasons behind the crying spells, whether the child is feeling unwell or seeking attention in some way. Once the problem is understood, parents can address it gently and effectively.
Apologize to Your Child After Losing Your Cool
If you unintentionally lose control in front of your children, the most important thing parents can do is sincerely apologize. This type of behavior will deeply impact how children develop their personalities in the future.
Some people have shared stories of feeling afraid of their mothers from a young age due to not having a warm childhood. When not obeying, their mothers often became angry and changed their personalities. The imposing figure of their mothers caused them to grow up with shy and easily hurt personalities. When they went away to school, they kept to themselves and did not want to contact their families.
Every mother expresses love for their children in different ways. Not everyone understands or agrees with the “love” through the use of physical punishment. For children, being constantly scolded and spanked by their mothers can make them feel unloved. Only when they grow up and experience various events in life can they realize that their mothers loved them in a different way, not as gentle or sweet as expected.
Therefore, when parents unfortunately let their emotions overwhelm them and become angry with their children, the key is to be willing to apologize and explain to the child that they are still loved. At the same time, parents should clearly communicate the reasons behind their anger. When children understand these things, they will easily forgive and feel closer to their parents.