In the trend of an increasing number of boys being born, it is understandable that many parents worry that their sons will have a harder time finding a wife. One of the goals that parents often think about is having money so that their sons have a good career and stable finances, making it easier to find a wife. However, in many countries nowadays, it is not finances that make it difficult for men to find a wife. Rather, it is the upbringing methods that parents use that make it harder for their sons to find a wife:
Controlling children too much, preventing independence
Many parents love their children but also worry about them, leading them to control their children tightly. Controlling children, whether they are boys or girls, does not bring any positive meaning. The act of control suffocates children and gradually takes away their freedom, independence, and autonomy. Nowadays, parents often have fewer children, so many people have a psychological fear of their children misbehaving or getting lost, leading to the emergence of control. However, this need for control has made children unable to develop their own personality. Although meticulous care from parents can ensure that their children are well taken care of, the strong desire for control by parents can prevent children from having independent opinions and make them hesitant when faced with major events.
Similar to raising fish, when raising fish in a fish tank, despite careful care, their growth will be limited compared to fish in the wild. Therefore, the act of controlling children by parents is very dangerous. Being a parent means giving children enough space to grow and develop their independence and autonomy early on. Parents should absolutely avoid controlling and clinging to their children too tightly. Overprotecting boys will make them lack independent views and not be self-reliant.
This is what scares girls away from boys. Moreover, when girls see boys being controlled by their parents, they are afraid that when they become daughters-in-law, they will be closely monitored by their in-laws. Women generally need a reliable man, so they prefer a strong, responsible man. Therefore, girls are afraid of boys who are tightly controlled by their parents.
Parents’ turbulent family
When parents are not happy and constantly argue in front of their children, it has a very negative impact on the psychological well-being of the children. Boys who witness their parents’ discord will feel scared of marriage and have a distorted view of marriage. Many boys who grow up in such families have unstable emotions and behaviors. Moreover, they do not know how to nurture their own marriages or how to love and forgive.
Many boys are afraid of getting married after witnessing their parents’ marital tragedies. Moreover, they are not taught how to take care of their women. Boys who grow up in a marriage hell will make them afraid of marriage when they become adults. Many parents even think that their arguments “have nothing to do with the children,” but in reality, their conflicts have a significant impact on the child’s psyche. When parents argue, the child feels insecure and believes that the safest haven is in the arms of his parents, which no longer exists. The constant conflicts not only make the child afraid of marriage as they grow up but also cause them to be emotionally damaged and have a distorted view of family, lacking love and affection. Children who grow up in such families are even more unhappy than those who grow up in poverty. Therefore, parents need to pay attention to balancing their lives. Money is not everything, although it is important. But if earning money leads to a turbulent family and overprotecting and controlling children, it is a danger to the future of the child.
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