“The significance of raising children: Does it matter if you are poor and raising a son, or wealthy and raising a daughter?”

Many parents believe that “poorly raising a son” means giving them less money to spend, while “richly raising a daughter” means treating them like a princess since childhood and using princess standards to nurture them. But it’s not like that!

So how do you “poorly” raise a son?

There is an old saying: “Through hardships to the stars”. Going through difficulties and hardships is what turns us into stars. If boys want to succeed, they should not avoid the “difficulties and hardships” that shape them.

Some people may understand “poorly raising a son” as giving them less money to make them poor and not allowing them to enjoy luxury. In fact, the important meaning of “poorly raising a son” is to let them experience their own poverty and hardships, and from there cultivate and nourish character, willpower, and personality, creating values for themselves.

For every boy, whether they grow up to be mature or mature, they need to be independent, strong, take on more responsibilities, and have the courage and bravery to face difficulties. It can be said that the process of growing up and being mature for a successful boy is a continuous process of challenging oneself.

When they grow up, sons will have to take on many responsibilities for their families and society, so parents need to nurture them with the following qualities:

1. Let your son experience a little hardship

An overly materialistic life and excessive spending are the greatest killers of children’s lives.

In order for children to actively improve themselves, for them to have the quality of frugality, and for them not to be trapped in a life of luxury, it is best for parents to let their sons experience a bit of hardship.

Parents can provide their children with favorable and good learning conditions and circumstances, but definitely should not provide them with too much extravagant material life.

2. Experience the feeling of failure

A flower grown in a greenhouse cannot withstand the rain and wind outside. Raising a son in a way that is coddling and precious like “having it in the mouth is afraid of swallowing, holding it in the hand is afraid of getting hurt” will make the child unable to cultivate strong willpower, but rather nurture a weak mentality and low tolerance for hardship. They will easily collapse mentally when faced with unfavorable situations or failures.

It is the difficulties and obstacles that can stimulate courageous spirit and encourage them to face reality. When a child encounters “failure,” parents should encourage them to overcome it, as it is also a way to win and to develop a positive mindset in the face of difficulties.

3. Cultivate a sense of independence in life

Education should not be in the style of “Handing over clothes at hand, giving food to the mouth”. In today’s society, there are many college students who do not know how to cook, wash clothes, or even fold blankets and clothes, which makes others surprised.

Can a man like that face the challenges in this society? Can they be creative?

As parents, even when children are young, they should train them to do things on their own according to their abilities and age. Working independently and taking care of themselves is the rule of life that everyone must learn.

4. Endure a suitable amount of sacrifice

There is an old saying: “The great husband can stand being stretched”. There are countless unfair things in life, so you have to face them bravely. Men need to learn perseverance. When a child behaves improperly, parents should reprimand or even punish them appropriately.

In life, it is difficult to avoid sacrifices, so accepting a suitable amount of sacrifice will help us understand life more deeply. Parents can encourage and support their children to overcome difficulties, which is also a way to win, to maintain a positive attitude in the face of challenges.

Experiencing various emotions will train a strong and resilient mindset, reduce the occurrence of emotional disorders, and improve the ability to withstand pressure.

5. Learn to take responsibility

Having courage and being willing to take responsibility makes a man more attractive. Responsibility is like a “badge” that is attached to a man’s shoulder.

So when children are young, they should be nurtured to have a sense of responsibility and take responsibility, so that in the future they can bear the main responsibilities for the family and have a sense of responsibility for the development of society, becoming a sincere and outstanding man.

As for daughters, they should be “richly raised”

“Richly raising a daughter” means focusing on cultivating their character and knowledge from an early age.

With a broad understanding, independence, opinions, and intelligence, they will have a better understanding of life. Having this understanding will prevent them from being overwhelmed and attracted by the dazzling things in life.

The first quality that a girl needs to nurture is empathy, a good character, the ability to control her own emotions, and a sense of gratitude.

1. Always encourage and support

Compared to boys, girls live in a world of “relationships”, so it is important for others to affirm and approve of them, and they need to be encouraged and supported to gain more strength.

For girls, affirmation, approval, encouragement, and support from others play a significant role in their own development. It serves as motivation for them to be confident, independent, and determined to pursue their goals.

Smart parents often say things like:

– Daughter, parents love you very much!

– Parents trust you.

– In the hearts of parents, you are the best!

When a girl has a heartbreaking problem, parents can hug her; when she is timid, parents can pat her on the shoulder to encourage her; when she is sad, parents should frequently offer kind words to encourage her; in their free time, parents can have heartfelt conversations with her…

Smart parents will never say things that are hurtful to their daughter, such as:

– Why do you always do things wrong!

– Compared to other people, you are really far behind.

– With such behavior, I really don’t know what future you’ll have!

– What girls need is care and encouragement from their parents.

2. Use love to nurture

“Internal richness” is the second thing that needs to be nurtured in girls, and it comes from love, which stems from the love parents have for their children.

Let’s use two stories to test the “level of love” of parents, the two stories represent two ways of expressing love for their children, let’s see which method parents choose!

Story 1:

A little girl and a neighbor’s child have a conflict, so the mother tells her daughter: “She is so annoying, it’s all her fault that your precious items got damaged. From now on, don’t play with her anymore.”

Story 2:

A little girl and a neighbor’s child have a conflict, so the mother tells her daughter: “Let’s forgive her, she used to bring toys for you to play with.”

What is true “love”? Through these two stories, I believe many people have found the answer for themselves.

Love is using positive, pure, warm, trusting, and optimistic language… words that evoke happiness and joy, so that they gradually seep into the innocent and soft soul of a girl. These things will help girls have more faith in life, to make their world full of love and happiness.

3. Take responsibility in nurturing

When nurturing girls, parents should not rely solely on “natural conditions”, but should have a “sense of responsibility”. What does “sense of responsibility” mean? It means that parents should be “actively involved” in their daughters’ lives.

When girls have an introverted personality, or even feel insecure, parents can “actively involve” themselves, create opportunities for their daughters to interact more with the outside world, provide more encouragement and praise, so that their daughters can feel more confident in themselves.

When girls show no special interests or talents, parents can “actively involve” themselves, such as taking their daughters to music shops or dance schools, to guide them in developing new interests.

When girls face important choices and find them difficult to handle, parents can “actively involve” themselves, analyze the pros and cons of the issue clearly for their girls, and provide guidance to help them understand the issue and make their own choices.

Taking responsibility does not mean that parents should take better care of their daughters’ eating, living, and daily activities. It means that parents need to take responsibility for nurturing their daughters’ education and capacity, taking responsibility for their physical and mental health, planning their lives, and taking responsibility for their children’s future…

Whether parents take responsibility or not will determine whether their daughters grow up to be people who lack opinions, relying on others for everything, or independent individuals who can handle everything themselves.