It is not uncommon for parents to make mistakes in their parenting approach, which can inadvertently cause harm to their children and create a rift between siblings. Let’s take a look at five common mistakes parents make that can lead to such divisions within the family.
1 Frequently Comparing Siblings
One of the things parents should avoid is frequently comparing their children to one another, as it can lead to several negative consequences:
- Creates pressure and stress as children feel they are in competition with their siblings, fearing they might lose.
- Children who are constantly compared to others may develop a lack of self-confidence and a sense of inferiority, impacting their development.
- Comparing siblings can damage the relationship between them.
- Negative emotions such as anxiety and low self-esteem can surround children, especially when they feel they are not meeting their parents’ expectations.
- Children may lose interest and motivation to try new things.
- It can have a long-lasting impact on children’s psychology.
Therefore, it is best for parents to refrain from making comparisons and instead recognize and appreciate each child’s unique achievements.
Frequently Comparing Siblings
2 Favoring One Child Over Another
When parents show favoritism towards one child, it can unintentionally lead to several negative outcomes:
- It affects the bond between siblings, as the less favored child may feel negative emotions such as being left out, sad, and having a poor opinion of their brothers or sisters.
- The less favored child may feel a lack of self-worth and motivation to try their best since their efforts are not acknowledged.
- The less favored child may develop a negative self-image, while the favored child may become self-absorbed and proud.
- The favored child may also experience stress and pressure to maintain their parents’ favor.
- The relationship between parents and children can become strained and distant due to a sense of inequality.
Treating all children fairly and without favoritism is essential for a harmonious family and the healthy psychological and emotional development of the children.
Favoring One Child Over Another
3 Over-Intervening in Minor Arguments Between Siblings
When parents intervene too much in minor disagreements between their children, it can have the following consequences:
- Children may not learn to resolve conflicts on their own if parents always step in to solve their problems.
- Children can become dependent on their parents instead of learning to be self-reliant.
- Sometimes, parents may resolve conflicts unfairly, leading to a sense of injustice and negatively impacting the relationship between siblings.
- Conflicts can provide an opportunity for children to learn emotional control, negotiation, and respect for others.
Therefore, parents should act as guides and supporters, teaching their children how to resolve conflicts on their own and knowing when to intervene to prevent negative consequences.
Over-Intervening in Minor Arguments Between Siblings
4 Punishing or Scolding a Child in Front of Their Siblings
Punishing or scolding a child in front of their siblings may seem harmless, but it can have several negative consequences:
- It creates a tense family atmosphere and impacts the psychology of both the punished child and the witnessing siblings.
- The witnessing siblings may mimic this behavior and treat others similarly.
- It greatly affects the child’s self-esteem when they are scolded in front of others.
- If the punishment is unfair, it can create a sense of injustice and favoritism in the children.
- It diminishes the respect children have for their parents.
Instead, parents should address these issues privately, respecting and protecting their children’s emotions.
Punishing or Scolding a Child in Front of Their Siblings
5 Ignoring or Assuming Young Children Don’t Understand
Sometimes, parents may dismiss certain behaviors or comments, assuming young children don’t understand, but this can lead to negative outcomes:
- Children may believe that their actions are acceptable and repeat them in the future.
- Children will not face the consequences of their mistakes and may continue to show a lack of respect for others.
- Children who feel unprotected and disrespected by their parents may experience anxiety and a sense of insecurity within the family environment.
Therefore, it is crucial for parents to intervene and educate their children in a timely manner, teaching them how to treat each other with respect.
Ignoring or Assuming Young Children Don’t Understand
These are the common mistakes parents make that can create a rift between siblings. We hope that by recognizing and avoiding these mistakes, parents can foster a harmonious and loving family environment for their children.
Source: Vietnamese Women’s Newspaper
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