5 Essential Steps for Parents to Help Children Set Their Own Goals

To live a happy and successful life, a child needs to be confident and independent. This helps them recognize their own value and persist in pursuing their aspirations. With these 5 steps, parents can help their child achieve just that.


Listen to Your Child

Many parents have high expectations for their children and set goals for them to achieve. However, this may not be good for the child. Parents should listen to their children to understand their perspectives before setting expectations or goals for them.

Give Your Child the Right to Decide

Parents should come to a mutual agreement with their child about the desired outcome, expectations, and how the child can achieve them.

Some parents often increase the number of assignments for their child each week. After a while, the child starts to feel bored and shows signs of resistance, without finding any motivation in it.

However, there are also parents who agree with their child on the number of questions and exercises to complete, and even the way the child wants to complete them. Therefore, every day the child feels happy and confident because they always find it as a new challenge and seek autonomy in solving problems.

Avoid Comparing Your Child to Others

Comparing your child to others is something that many parents fall into. Parents always want their child to be like other people’s children, or even better. When the child doesn’t meet expectations, parents start comparing. This is a mistake that parents should correct.

Although when comparing, parents may have good intentions to encourage the child to try harder. However, sometimes it will have the opposite effect. The child will underestimate their own value and that of others. Therefore, parents should always recognize the child’s effort and achievements, and not compare the child to anyone.

Teach Your Child to Face Failure

Parents need to teach their child that anyone can make mistakes, whether it’s parents, teachers, or even famous people. Making mistakes or facing failure doesn’t determine a person’s success, only when they fear accepting failure and avoid seeking new solutions is the path to failure.

Therefore, when the child makes a mistake or has a poor grade, parents should help the child recognize those shortcomings and guide the child to discuss how to do better. The attitude of parents is very important. Parents should be open-minded and engage with the child’s failures instead of criticizing or labeling. When the child grows up, they will silently thank for this wonderful open-mindedness.

Acknowledge Your Child’s Efforts

Parents should not only focus on the result but also on the child’s efforts. Every effort of the child is a strength behind it. If parents only focus on the result, the child will only know two words: happy or sad. But if parents focus on each effort the child makes, the child will know their own strength. This is the real energy that helps the child go far and sustainably.

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