When it comes to raising children, we often encounter situations that make us angry. But if we don’t learn to control our own behavior, it’s difficult to train exceptional children. That’s why teaching children is also teaching ourselves, as children grow up, parents grow up with them. And great parents with successful children are the ones who have controlled their own instincts to teach their children in the best way possible, in the most joyful atmosphere.
Therefore, when raising children, parents need to pay attention to the following 3 behaviors:
Parents who can’t control their emotions make their children unstable
There is a fact that happens in many families: parents find it difficult to control their emotions, so when there is a disagreement or when their children make mistakes, parents quickly scold their children and do not patiently listen to their explanations. The way parents lack emotional control will lead to children wanting to get angry again because of frustration and feeling unheard.
When parents lose control and say things that are hard to hear or dismiss their children with phrases like “I don’t want to hear it,” “You can’t do anything,” “You will…” then children will follow suit. Both sides’ tension will be harmful to the development of the child’s brain. Being in such an environment for a long time, children gradually do not learn how to regulate their own emotions. In the end, children grow up to be emotionally unstable individuals, and that is extremely detrimental in social communication and leads to children alienating and fearing others.
Many parents complain about their children, such as their children being hot-tempered, not being lively, not being happy, or frowning… At that time, remember if you are the same. Because children’s issues often reflect their parents’ issues. The emotions that parents use when communicating with their children are often what children use to deal with life.
If parents have stable psychology and positive energy, children will receive these things. A good family education environment begins with parents changing their own emotions, so that children gradually receive warmth, from which they become kind and happy people. Parents’ emotions are children’s lives, so be careful.
Parents’ anger makes children lose confidence, weaken willpower, and fear challenges
The family education environment will determine a child’s future, how a child chooses his/her own path. If parents easily get angry when their children do not meet their expectations, when they make mistakes, it will make the child try to avoid, make the child afraid, and make the child lack confidence. If parents verbally abuse their children when they make mistakes, the child will be afraid and not dare to tell the truth the next time and they will try to cover up their mistakes, then live in fear, lack self-confidence, weaken determination, and always avoid problems. Such children will no longer rely on their parents to share their feelings, but they will hide them or find someone else to express them. And thus, the affection between parents and children drifts further apart. Finally, the child’s life will be entangled in avoiding fear, never daring to face their own issues head-on.
Therefore, parents should truly be their children’s companions, be tolerant and listen, teach children their mistakes, and guide them. A joyful and warm educational environment will help children become courageous and dare to admit and correct their mistakes.
Parents’ bad habits can’t make children become good and beautiful
Youth learn from adults. So, when parents are sloppy and have no discipline, how can they impose discipline on their children? If parents still have messy and many bad habits, how can they help their children develop well?
Therefore, when parents cultivate good habits, children will also learn and follow. They say that looking at children shows who their parents are, looking at parents shows who their children are. Family rules, the habitual behavior of parents affects their children. Parents are the first and closest role models to their children, helping their children develop.
If parents are lazy and refuse to clean up, children will follow that style of behavior. If parents are diligent, children will also be diligent. If parents love to read books, children will also love to read and listen to their parents read.
Parents who often read books and love to read will teach their children this habit. On the other hand, if parents refuse to read books but keep telling their children to read, it will not convince them at all. An expert in education once said: The most important rules for raising children focus on the parents themselves. First and foremost, parents must solve their own issues before establishing an ideal parent-child relationship. That shows that teaching children is not about saying that children have to be this or that, but it’s about changing ourselves in order for children to learn and change.
Being a parent is a whole process of learning and developing ourselves so that children can learn and develop along.
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